When people would ask me about my lovelife and learn that I am still the same, that is, still single since birth, they only have one comment. Don’t worry, it will come, you just have to wait. I want to scream at them, I went to say stop it. Don’t comment about my status. Don’t tell me to just wait. I would rather accept a no comment reply, or I would rather have you change the topic than giving me that pathetic answer: Don’t worry, it will come.

Because it is the same comment that I receive from people, over and over again. The same comment that I want to haul back at their face. They do not understand me, my situation. They, for me, are the Others. They are content with their own lovelives, bashing all over their boyfriends, their dates, their affairs. They must have forgotten that no-so-long-ago, when they are nothing but a single chick like me, they moan and whine about the unfairness of their own lovelives.

But the moment that they have found their own respective partners, they turn to me and say, it’s not a big problem you know. So why the rush?

Fuck.

I want to ask them, have you went an operation lately that the anesthesia they have provided you caused selective forgetfulness? Have you forgotten the endless nights you’ve spent calling me on my landline, ranting to me how pathetic you are because your beau is not giving you the attention that you crave? How you promised that one day, when the time has come that you would find a boyfriend, you’d help me find my own?

Why then, when you had already left the singlehood association, when I am relating to you my own pathetic grievances about my lovelife, would you turn to me and say, just wait, okay, it will come? Why do you berate me when I tell you about my pathetic existence, and even had the nerve to tell me that I should not dream of having a boyfriend because it will only provoke tears and pain?

Yes, I am angry. Because people tend to look at this situation in a nonchalant way. They would say that it is not really a problem. They, who are happy to snuggle in their own comfortable lovelives. They, who have someone to hook up with every Friday, or every weekend. They, who have that special someone that they need to look up to during valentine’s, christmas and even new year. They, who have someone whom they could call and rant their own personal problems with. I am not saying that having a significant other is the perfect solution. Of course, there are problems that can be encountered also. But look on the bright side. You have someone.

Think of that single person who visits the club on her own, dressed in her best dress, sitting in the bar, trying to look calm and poised, when all the while she was praying that there would be a man who would be brave enough to talk to her, or buy her next drink. Think of that single girl staying at home during weekends, curling infront of her television, watching endless episodes of her favorite series, or romance movies, crying her heart out, memorizing all those sappy love quotes and feeling like the movie is written in accordance to their situation. Think of the business-minded career woman who, because she cannot change her lovelife, decided to concentrate on climbing on the executive ladder, to show the male population that she is unaffected, that she is powerful. Think of the woman who suddenly decided to go to the gym, or to social gatherings, because she might meet her partner there. Think of the single girl who cries to bed at night, who spends the last remaining minutes of her day asking God to show her the man that was meant for her.

You don’t know don’t you. All of you in-a-relationship friends. You think that every single girl in here is happy, while in reality, we are all looking for that significant other. You don’t understand the emotions of a single girl when she would rant to you her depression, her never-ending questions as to why she is still in that status. You have no idea about that, of course. Because all of you are too wrapped up in your own personal affairs to contemplate the feeling of loneliness, of despair, or being alone. Of course, the moment that your relationship begins to crumble, the moment you are dumped and hastily returned back to singlehood, you decided that you feel their pain after all, the pain of being alone, of being single. You decide to mingle with your single friends, because they knew how it is to be alone.

So, the next time you ask a single girl about her lovelife and she replied on the negative, do not say, it will come. Just don’t comment at all. You are rubbing pain in the wound you know. Or better yet, just change the topic, if you do not want us silently wishing your relationship to break apart.